Affordable Personal Transportation.....

 

Winter Fasting......

 

*Exercise - 100 Pushups......

 

Winter Weight Gain........

 

Sexy Farmer.......

Cletus is passing by Billy Bob's hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old green John Deere.

Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first the right strap of his overalls, followed by the left. He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move, lets his overalls fall down to his hips, revealing a torn and frayed plaid shirt. Then, grabbing both sides of his shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his stained T-shirt underneath.  With a final flourish, he tears the T-shirt from his body, and hurls his baseball cap onto a pile of hay.

Having seen enough, Cletus rushes in and says, "What the world're ya doing, Billy Bob?"

"Good grief, Cletus, ya scared the bejeebers out of me," says an obviously embarrassed Billy Bob. "But me 'n the wife been havin trouble lately in the bedroom d'partment, and the therapist suggested 
I do something sexy to a tractor." 

(Don't make me come splain this to you! Read the last line again, slowly.) 

Wild Dog.....

 

Home Alone.....

 

Financial Planning.........

 

Dan was a single guy living at home with his father, and working in the family business. When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, He decided he needed to find a wife with whom to share his fortune. One evening, at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like an ordinary guy," he said to her, "but in just a few years, My father will die and I will inherit $200 million." Impressed, the woman asked for his business card. Three days later, she became his stepmother. Women are good at financial planning .

Never used App......

 

War Today......

 

They want my body.......

 

Geoundhog Day.......