Cheap Bastards

A  couple was celebrating 50 years together.

 

 

Their three kids, all very successful, agreed to a
Sunday dinner in their honour.

 

"Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad," gushed son number
one. 'Sorry I'm running late. I had an emergency at the hospital with a
patient, you know how it is, and I didn't have time to get you a gift."

 

"Not to worry," said the father. "The important
thing is that we're all together today."

Son number two arrived and announced, "You and Mom
look great, Dad. I just flew in from Los Angeles between depositions and
didn't have time to shop for you."

 

"It's nothing," said the father. "We're glad you
were able to come."

 

Just then the daughter arrived. "Hello and happy
anniversary! I'm sorry, but my boss is sending me out of town and I was
really busy packing so I didn't have time to get you anything."

 

After they had finished dessert, the father said,
"There's something your mother and I have wanted to tell you for a long
time. You see, we were very poor. Despite this, we were able to send each
of you to college. Throughout the years your mother and I knew that we
loved each other very much, but we just never found the time to get
married."

 

The three children gasped and all said, "You mean
we're bastards?"
"Yep," said the father,
"And cheap ones too."